Infant Potty Training

I am doing some research for one of my readers on what to do when an older child (5 years old) is still having potty training issues and whether this signals a problem. In the process, I found this article on Baby Center about infant potty training.I can't imagine teaching my 11 month old to use the potty, but it would be nice!

What is infant potty training?Also called "elimination communication" or "natural infant hygiene," infant potty training is the practice of introducing your baby to the toilet or potty at a very young age — usually between birth and 4 months.

Some parents who do this avoid diapers completely by racing their baby to the nearest bathroom whenever they anticipate a poop or pee. Others use diapers on and off. By 18 months, in most cases, their children have "graduated" — that is, they know when they have to use the toilet and get themselves there successfully.

In contrast, the average baby boy in the United States gives up diapers at 39 months and the average girl at 36 months, according to a 2001 study by the Medical College of Wisconsin. (It typically takes eight to ten months for a child to go from complete reliance on diapers to being fully potty trained, the study found.)

While the notion of potty training a very young infant seems radical to many American parents, it's not a new idea. Prior to 1950, most children in the United States were toilet trained by 18 months. And today, most African, Asian, and European babies are trained well before their second birthday.

So why are American babies and their parents so attached to their diapers? Many think it's due in part to the changing views of experts about toilet training, as well as the invention of disposable diapers. During the 1950s, Dr. Spock and other experts began advocating a more relaxed approach to toilet training.

Then, in the 1960s, parenting expert Dr. T. Berry Brazelton advocated an even gentler, more "child-centered" philosophy: He encouraged parents to allow children to follow their own timetable when it came to giving up diapers. Brazelton's view caught on around the same time as disposable diapers, which tend to be more comfortable for babies (they're so absorbent that babies don't feel wet) and easier for parents to deal with. Against this backdrop, it's no surprise that the average age of toilet training crept up.

Alright Baby Center, thank for making me feel lazy about training my kids to use the potty! Has anyone tried this? Is it as time consuming and frustrating as it sounds? Are we bad parents if we choose to wait until the child is two to start training?

-NewsAnchorMom Jen

Who's smarter? Husband or Wife?

A NewsAnchorMom reader sent me this article from Newsweek on who is smarter you or your spouse.

The Newsweek article is based on a study by a British researcher that shows a man's ego is often larger than his I.Q., but women tend to think men are smarter.

Are men smarter than women? No. But they sure think they are. An analysis of some 30 studies by British researcher Adrian Furnham, a professor of psychology at University College London, shows that men and women are fairly equal overall in terms of IQ.
But women, it seems, underestimate their own candlepower (and that of women in general), while men overestimate theirs.

Furnham talks to NEWSWEEK's Joan Raymond about his findings and why perceived IQ matters.

Excerpts:

NEWSWEEK: Many studies show that men score slightly higher in IQ tests. Is this significant?

Adrian Furnham: Universally, men tend to score higher on certain specialized skills, such as spatial awareness. In the real world, that means they might be better at reading maps or navigating. Women score higher in terms of language development and emotional intelligence. But most experts agree there is no real, important overall difference when it comes to gender andintelligence.

NEWSWEEK:But women think they aren't as smart as men?

Adrian Furnham:That's the conundrum. What I study is "perceived intelligence," essentially how smart people think they are. I analyzed 30 international studies, and what I found was that women, across the world, tend to underplay their intelligence, while men overstate it.

NEWSWEEK:So do most men think they're Albert Einstein?

Adrian Furnham:There certainly is a greater male ego. It's what we call the male hubris and female humility effect. Men are more confident about their IQ. These studies show that on average, women underestimate their IQ scores by about five points while men overestimate their own IQs. Since these studies were international in scope, the results were essentially the same whether women were from Argentina, America, Britain, Japan or Zimbabwe. Another factor affecting perception may be distribution of IQ ... Although [men and women] are on average the same, the people at the very top and the very bottom of the IQ bell curve are more likely to be men. That is a pattern that we see in the university setting, with men either being at the very top of the class or at the bottom.

NEWSWEEK:Do women tend to think that men are smarter than they are?

Adrian Furnham:Surprisingly, [both] men and women perceive men being smarter across generations. Both sexes believe that their fathers are smarter than their mothers and grandfathers are more intelligent than their grandmothers.

NEWSWEEK:What about the kids?

Adrian Furnham:If there are children, [both] men and women think their sons are brighter than their daughters.

NEWSWEEK: So women have a self-esteem problem?
Adrian Furnham:I'm not advocating for self-esteem training and therapy. I think that many of the self-help gurus argue incorrectly that improved self-esteem increases performance. Helping people to perform better increases their self esteem. Giving a kind of carte blanche to self-esteem isn't a good idea in my mind. Rather, I think it should be that increased performance and feedback on the causes of that performance, ability or effort raises self-esteem. As I said, in primary and secondary schools, girls are outperforming boys. And where appropriate, their self-beliefs, hopefully, are increasing.

Well, I guess I'm normal because I do think my husband is smarter than me. He has the best memory of anyone I have every met. He's one of those people who rarely has to study. He just picks things up and he remembers them forever. I am always on his Trivial Pursuit team because of this.

How about you? Who's smarter in your household?

-NewsAnchorMom Jen

Preparing for Pregnancy

I recently posted an Associated Press article on how women might want to avoid caffeine when they are pregnant because new research shows a cup and a half a day of coffee doubles your chances of miscarriage.

Dr. Michael Leonardi from Maternal Fetal in Peoria, Illinois says there is a lot more you should keep in mind BEFORE you get pregnant. He said,"By the time a pregnancy test turns positive, most of the baby’s organs have already formed. It may be too late to make changes to limit the impact on the baby’s development."

Here are the key points:

1. Don't smoke and avoid second hand smoke:Women who smoke have an increased risk for infertility, delayed conception, ectopic pregnancy, spontaneous abortion (miscarriage), as well as complications during pregnancy. Smoking during pregnancy is associated with increased risks for low birth weight infants. It is the single largest modifiable risk factor for IUGR (intrauterine growth retardation). Mothers who smoke are more likely to have their water break early and more likely for placenta previa. SIDS is three-fold more common in infants who live in a household where anyone smokes. Children exposed to second hand smoke are also at increased risk for pneumonia, bronchitis, asthma, and ear infections. 9600 excess perinatal deaths are annually attributed to cigarette smoking during pregnancy.
2. Start taking vitamins:Women who could become pregnant should ensure intake of 400 micrograms or more of folate either from dietary or supplemental sources daily. The risk of a first episode of neural tube defect is decreased by approximately 50% in women who consume adequate folic acid prior to pregnancy. Although it has not yet reached the level of a consensus recommendation, there is emerging epidemiologic evidence to suggest that a balanced multivitamin preparation may reduce the risk of nonsyndromic fetal cardiac defects by up to 25%.
3. Get a Cystic fibrosis screening: Cystic fibrosis is the most common autosomal recessive condition affecting the Caucasian population. All patients contemplating pregnancy should be offered screening for CF. If testing has previously been performed, it need not be repeated.
   
4. Avoid Alcohol.
5. Maintain a balanced diet and healthy weight.
6. Avoid environmental toxin exposure.
7. Make sure immunizations are up to date.
8. Get pre-existing conditions (like diabetes and high blood pressure) under control.
9. Talk to an obstetrician prior to conception, especially if you have a chronic medical condition.

I don't smoke, so I never actually read what smoking can do to a baby. Wow! I would think that would make someone quit pretty fast or at least trying really hard to quit. I never started taking vitamins until after I knew I was pregnant. I just never thought about it. Now I know.

-NewsAnchorMom Jen

Getting Off the Bottle

A friend of mine is having trouble convincing her husband that their almost two-year-old little boy needs to stop taking a bottle.

Here's some information she found on the issue from On Call:

Dr. Claire McCarthy said:

"You should get him off the bottle. Children don't need much milk at this age. Before a year, breast milk or formula provides the bulk of their nutrition, even as they start expanding their diet. But after a year, kids should be eating a variety of other foods, and milk becomes less important (in fact, filling up on milk can sometimes prevent them from eating other healthy foods).

Nutritionally, milk is important for its protein and calcium, but your child can get calcium from yogurt and cheese, and in vegetables such as broccoli, kale, collards, and mustard greens. Protein is available in other dairy products, meat, fish, beans, and grains. Milk is fortified with vitamin D, but 16 ounces a day is enough to meet a child's needs, and many other dairy products as well as cereals are supplemented with it.

My youngest child, Natasha, was breastfed exclusively and never made the transition to cow's milk — she simply doesn't like the taste. Now, at age 3, she'll take a sip here and there, but it adds up to a total of maybe eight ounces a month. So we push other dairy products instead, making sure she gets enough protein, along with calcium-fortified orange juice (which she loves), and daily multivitamins. She's a thoroughly healthy little girl.

Like most people who grew up being told to drink their milk, I certainly thought of it as something positive — and it is. But as a pediatrician I've seen how too much of a good thing isn't always a good thing. Being on the bottle too long, especially when a child is allowed to sleep with it, can lead to rotting teeth. Also, kids who drink large amounts of milk may end up with anemia or constipation due to the direct effects of excess milk, and also because it can replace iron-rich protein foods, vegetables, and other roughage."~Dr. Claire McCarthy

Here's some advice I found on a mommy blog:

"Have you tried giving him a drinking cup instead? If you don't have any then tell him that "he is a big boy now and bottles are for babies" then take him to the store and ask him to choose his drinking cup. You want to get him involved because when you come back home he is going to help you throw out the old bottles. "

"My daughter was very attached to her bottle at night too. I tried sippy cups but the flow was always too fast. Then I found this one at Wal-mart : Grip n Sip, the cost at Wal-mart where I am is 97 cent. It has a no drip stopper that prevents it from flowing out freely. So if she's laying down it's not going to choke her. The liquid has to be sucked out."

Here are tips on weaning off bottle feeding from Revolution Health:

• Do not allow a toddler to carry the bottle around.
• Help transfer the toddler's attachment from the bottle to another comfort object like a stuffed animal, blanket or doll. For example, tie an empty bottle securely around the neck of a favorite stuffed animal or other comfort object, then remove the bottle once your toddler thinks of the new object as the source of comfort.
• Make changes in the toddler's routine, especially the rituals that are connected to bottle-feeding. For example, after a fall, comfort your toddler with hugs and attention rather than the bottle.
• Keep the toddler busy with new activities.
• Make a cup part of weaning.

-NewsAnchorMom Jen

Finding Time for your Spouse

There just aren't enough hours in the day. I just got off the phone with my 4-year-old who said, "Mamma, when are you gonna come home? I bet not until after the 10 o'clock news, right?" I dread this conversation on the nights when I just don't have time to run home for dinner. It's hard to make time for my kids, much less my husband.

Here's a recent comment:

"Thanks, Jen. I would love to hear how other working moms are "doing it all" as well. How about a blog with tips and ideas from your readers. When do you find time for couple time? My husband and I haven't had a date alone in years! Literally years. We love the kids and are a great team as parents....but at the end of the day I have no game left as a wife. I would love to get some tips on how to keep my marriage and my family alive."-Chelsea

My husband and I are lucky to have parents who offer to babysit at least once a month. That is a huge help. In the past, we have been bad at making time for our relationship, but we're getting better at it. We frequently have a sitter come over on Sunday afternoon and go see a matinee or go to lunch. We end up spending a lot less money than when we do a date 'night.' And because our afternoon dates are cheaper, we can have them more often.

FamilyEducation.com says there are three categories of time you need to keep in mind:

1. Time for planning.
2. Time for resolving differences.
3. Time for fun.

As an example, find the most convenient time for you and your spouse to get together without the kids. Write it down on your calendar. Then, throughout the week, jot down the topics or important issues the two of you need to discuss. When the 'date' arrives, talk about the issues first, then go do something fun.

About.com on Marriage has this advice for making time with your spouse:

1. Schedule a weekend just for the two of you. Write it on your calendar, put it on your computer planner, etc. Don't change it for any other event. You don't have to go anywhere.
2. Have lunch together once a week. On nice days, meet in a park.
3. Let your children know that you two need time alone together. Tell them they can knock on your closed bedroom door only if there is blood. (This one made me laugh because I have young kids and that would just be mean! However, I can see how that might work with older children.)
4. Walk around the block together.

What are your suggestions? How do you make time for your spouse? When is the last time you went on a date with your husband/wife?

-NewsAnchorMom Jen

Dosage Errors for Kid's Medicine

I don't know about you, but I have a hard remembering how many ounces or teaspoons of medicine to give my kids when they are sick. Most of the bottles say to call a doctor if the child is under two. So, when my baby gets sick in the middle of the night, I am left with not knowing how much to give him.

I was looking at this medical website today that says our Pediatricians might not know exactly how much medicine to give our kids. I find this hard to believe, but the article says doctors aren't given enough training on the dosage amounts for kids.

The News-Medical net article said:
"Children pose particular prescribing problems, say the authors, because the absence of formulations designed specifically for them means that doses have to be individually calculated, increasing the chances of error.
And children are particularly vulnerable to the consequences of a mistake.
Previous research also shows that junior doctors often feel inadequately prepared to prescribe confidently, or don't know which drugs to prescribe for conditions, such as chest infections or anaphylaxis (life threatening allergic reaction)."

There is some good news. The information is partially based on a small survey of doctors . So, I would guess your doctor (as long as he or she has been practicing for a few years) feels more confident than the ones who were polled:

"The authors acknowledge that their research may not reflect a comprehensive picture of prescribing training, but there is currently no validated method of assessment, nor any national standards on the teaching of prescribing medicines for children."

The information is based on research found in the Archives of Disease in Childhood.

Now I am wondering if it is ever a good idea to give my kids medication. If you read my post earlier this week, you know The FDA is concerned about cough and cold medicine for kids. There may be proof they don't work. So, if there is no good training on how much medicine we should give our kids and the FDA says most of it doesn't work, should we be medicating them at all?

I definitely think ibuprofen and acetaminophen have dropped my kids' temperatures in minutes. When I look at all the other over-the-counter medication for kids, I am not sure if they really work. What are your thoughts?

-NewsAnchorMom Jen

Movies for Kids

My husband and I took the kids to see the new Veggie Tales movie this past weekend. We try to do something as a family each weekend. Movies aren't the best option with an 11 month old, but my 4-year-old really wanted to go. We absolutely love Veggie Tales and have several of the movies. This new one, "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything" didn't have a clear cut theme besides fighting the bad guys. That didn't work so well for our family.

My son has night terrors. I saw him cover his eyes during certain parts of the movie and knew he would be waking up scared that evening. I was right. So, after the fact, I realize there is this great website where you can read exactly what kind of violence is in a movie. If I had done my homework, I would have known the cheese curls come to life in the movie and the rocks try to attack people. That would have helped me decide to skip this particular "G" rated movie.

Now you don't have to make the same mistake I did. The site is kids-in-mind.com . Here's their review of "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything." By the way, you can find reviews on the site about all movies, not just ones aimed at little kids.

And here's the TV Guide review of the movie. Personally, it was my least favorite of all the Veggie Tales movies, but maybe I'm being too hard on the cute little cucumber.

-NewsAnchorMom Jen
P.S. My son saw the Veggie Tales picture on my blog this morning and wants everyone to know he loved the movie despite the fact that it gave him nightmares. He says he loved it, loved it, loved it.

Ty Refuses Lead Toy recall

Here's the latest from the Associated Press:

Ty Incorporated is refusing to pull a popular, but lead-tainted, doll from store shelves across the state. Illinois authorities thought they'd agreed with Ty to have the company voluntarily remove its Jammin' Jenna dolls from retail shelves because the toys contained high amounts of lead.

Westmont-based Ty is best known for its Beanie Babies. The company says it would no longer sell new versions of Jammin' Jenna to Illinois retailers. But the state says the company is refusing to recall dolls already in stores and some remain on store shelves.

Now the state is considering suing Ty to force the company to comply with state law. Representatives of Ty say it's not violating the law because federal rules have higher lead limits, and supersede the state provisions.

If you have one of these dolls and want more information, the Chicago Tribune has a lengthy article on the potential lawsuit.

Lead can be very dangerous to kids. Kids growing bodies absorb more lead and their brains and central nervous system are more sensitive to the effects. If your child ingests a large amount of lead, it can harm their brain function, change their behavior, slow their growth and cause learning problems. Lead poisoning has also been associated with hearing problems and headaches.

If you are worried your child may have lead poisoning, you can have a simple blood test performed at your pediatrician's office or the public health department.

-NewsAnchorMom Jen

Vbac Deliveries

Vbac is the term used when referring to a pregnant woman having a vaginal deliver when she has had a previous cesarean section or c-section. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the vbac rate fell by almost 70% in the last ten years. However, studies show many women who choose a c-section could have a safe vbac.

According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists(ACOG), the saying "once a cesarean, always a cesarean" dominated the practice for about 70 years, but began changing about 30 years ago due to improvements in obstetric care.

Here's a message I received from a reader:

"Hi Jen! I recently viewed your site and have a question that I would love for you to further investigate. My husband and I would like to have another child; however, prior to becoming pregnant again I am hoping to gather more information on the safety of vbac deliveries and their popularity in the Peoria area."

Are vbacs safe? Dr. Michael Leonardi from Maternal Fetal in Peoria, Illinois says in a small number of women, the stitches from a previous c-section can tear, causing a uterine rupture and putting the baby and the mom in immediate danger. However, he says 60-80% of women who have a cesarean section can have a safe vaginal delivery the next time. He says women who have had one successful vaginal delivery, then had a c-section and are pregnant with a third child are the best candidates for vbac.

Is there anyone who should stay away from a vbac? Dr. Leonardi says women who live in rural areas and will be delivering their baby in a smaller hospital should probably avoid a vbac.

So what kind of hospital is best for vbacs? Dr. Leonardi said, "Do it in a teaching hospital, not an outlying area. An obstetrician and an anesthesiologist need to be in the hospital in case there are complications. If the wound from a previous c-section tears, an immediate cesarean section would have to take place or there would be a catastrophic outcome."

What doctors in town perform vbacs? Dr. Leonardi says all obstetricians can do vaginal deliveries after c-sections. You don't have to go to a specialist. However, he says to stick with an obstetrician as opposed to a family practice doctor who does deliveries. He also says to find out how the doctor feels about vbacs. Dr. Leonardi said, "Pick someone who is middle of the road rather than one extreme or the other. Ask a lot of questions and find someone who spends a lot of time with you. Don’t be pushed to do one thing or another."

Which is safer a vaginal delivery or a c-section? Dr. Leonardi said, "The recovery is faster for a vaginal delivery. In general, babies get a better start in life. Water gets out of their lungs quicker and there is less risk for a transfusion. However, repeat c-sections usually do just fine. " He says women can get into trouble if they are having 5 to 6 babies and deliver all of them through c-section.

Do you have any tips for ensuring a safe vbac? Dr. Leonardi says not to be induced if you want to have a successful vbac. Induction is more likely to lead to a cesarean.

What would you do if it was your wife? Dr. Leonardi answered, "There is a very small risk for the scar separating or rupturing about 1/150. If that happens, an emergency c-section is usually fine, but 1/1000 has a catastrophic outcome. So, vbacs are fairly safe."

Why are fewer people having vbacs? "The number of people having vbacs between 1989-1996 was close to 30%, now it’s more like the 13%. Some of that is based on fear of a bad outcome, some is based on people wanting to schedule their delivery, some is because people want their tubes tied at the same time, " said Dr. Leonardi.

If you have a topic you would like to see me cover on this blog, email me at newsanchormom [at] gmail [dot] com.

-NewsAnchorMom Jen

Caffeine and Pregnancy

I just had a conversation with a perinatologist (high risk pregnancy expert ) last week about this very topic.

Here's the story from ABC News:

Expectant mothers have new cause for concern. Pregnant women may want to give up their daily caffeine fix. A new study finds consuming just one and half cups of coffee a day--or more than 200 milligrams of caffeine-- doubles the risk of miscarriage--and that goes for tea, hot chocolate, and soda.

Obstetrician Dr. Tracy Flanagan said, "What's different about this study is that it shows that a fairly low level of caffeine may be associated with miscarriage, and that's important."

Pregnant women have long been advised to limit their caffeine. Now Dr. Flanagan is counseling her patients to give it up altogether.

It's not clear why caffeine can cause miscarriage. It is known to cross the placenta and can be difficult for the fetus to metabolize.

So what's a pregnant mom looking for an energy boost to do?

Doctors suggest taking a brisk walk, yoga or go ahead and get that grande latte, but make it decaf.

I just talked to Peoria Perinatologist Dr. Michael Leonardi about doing a blog on what women can do to prevent miscarriage. It sounds like caffeine will be high on that list. I will email Dr. Leondardi and post his other tips later this week.

-NewsAnchorMom Jen

Kids and the Dentist

My 4-year-old son is so excited because he got TWO sticky eyeballs.

Have you ever told your kids they have to brush their teeth or they will fall out? Let me tell you, my son won't soon forget that after the latest dental appointment. He really didn't want to go, but was being pretty brave considering the circumstances. Fortunately, his teeth are in great shape. But the little boy next to us.. not so lucky. As my son was clenching my hand, the little boy next to us starts screaming at the top of his lungs. I'm thinking it's his first dental visit and he's scared. Then, his mom starts explaining to the dentist how her son's tooth had fallen out. Her two-year-old son's tooth fell out for no apparent reason! Sure enough, the dentist says he has periodontal disease and his mom says over and over, “See I told you honey, you need to let me brush your teeth or they will fall out.”

Our dental hygientist is a little stunned by the situation. She looks at the fear in my son's eyes, finishes cleaning his teeth and lets him pick two toys out of the bin instead of one. So my son was excited to get two sticky eyeball toys.. and he brushed his teeth twice before he went to bed!

When should your child first go to the dentist? The American Academy of Pediatric Dentistry recommends at one-year-old. Did you know there are pediatric dentists? According to webMD, pediatric dentists have two years of additional experience beyond dental school. I thought they just catered to kids with toys, movies and kid-friendly equipment. Who knew they actually have more training in spotting dental problems with kids? I'm thrilled.

And what about that pacifier? Is it really that bad for my child's teeth? You can find a list of commonly asked dental questions and answers at healthy smiles healthy children.

-NewsAnchorMom Jen