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Will new research on the negative impact of spanking change your discipline routine?
From ABC: Spanking children could teach them to be more violent, according to new research. Mothers who spanked their children even occasionally were more likely to report aggressive behavior in their kids.
In surveys, nearly all adults remember being spanked as children. And the cycle continues, as most admit they spank their kids at least occasionally. Parents spank kids because they lose their tempers, experts say, but also because spanking works in the short-term to get a child's attention. But new research finds spanking has long-term negative effects on children's behavior.
Researchers studied more than 3,300 American mothers & toddlers and found that kids who were spanked tended to be more aggressive. Mothers reported how often their children engaged in behaviors such as hitting, getting into fights, or not getting along with other kids. Results showed that kids who were spanked several times in the last month were 40 percent more likely to display aggressive behaviors. Those spanked less frequently were still rated as 17 per cent more aggressive than their peers.
Experts say that - instead of spanking -- parents should distract infants and young toddlers away from unwanted behaviors, and use time outs or denying of privileges to discipline older children.
Source: presented at the 2008 American Public Health Association meeting in San Diego
Do you spank your children? Why or Why not?
-NewsAnchorMom Jen
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11 comments:
I did spank my kids from time to time if needed. They were not beaten nor bruised. They were disciplined. they are grown now and both great young adults. They are not violent at all.
Proverbs 13:24
As an APer, I do not spank or hit my son. I do not think it is appropriate, nor does it teach appropriate behavior.
I don't (and didn't) spank my children. Foremost, it just seemed wrong, and I always questioned using a punishment that mimiced the behaviour it was intended to repress...
This isn't exactly new research.
This is from NewsAnchorMom Reader Sara:
Hello I just want to say I am a firm believer in spanking. Time outs do not work on a 18month old and a 5 yr old. Also taking away privelages dont work. At their ages they are not into the internet, phone, tv, whatever. I also do not agree in sending them to their rooms. Its just sending the message yes you are in trouble go to your room and play until I tell you to come out. A majority of the kids I have met even some of my friends kids who are not spanked when doing wrong are horrible in public, have no sense of conequences for their actions, and are the meanest kids I know. My children do not get spanked out of anger thats abuse, they are spanked only on the rear end and only when they do something they know they should not be doing. I refuse to have a child who is disrespectful to everyone and thinks the world owes them something. My daughter does very well in school and is very polite, but she also knows that if she gets in trouble at school or with someone she gets punished at home as well. The key is sticking to what you say and hold them accountable for their actions. I dont believe I abuse my children I believe I am being a parent not a best friend and thats what these kids need now a days. Thanks and God bless!
This is from NewsAnchorMom Reader Sara:
Hello I just want to say I am a firm believer in spanking. Time outs do not work on a 18month old and a 5 yr old. Also taking away privelages dont work. At their ages they are not into the internet, phone, tv, whatever. I also do not agree in sending them to their rooms. Its just sending the message yes you are in trouble go to your room and play until I tell you to come out. A majority of the kids I have met even some of my friends kids who are not spanked when doing wrong are horrible in public, have no sense of conequences for their actions, and are the meanest kids I know. My children do not get spanked out of anger thats abuse, they are spanked only on the rear end and only when they do something they know they should not be doing. I refuse to have a child who is disrespectful to everyone and thinks the world owes them something. My daughter does very well in school and is very polite, but she also knows that if she gets in trouble at school or with someone she gets punished at home as well. The key is sticking to what you say and hold them accountable for their actions. I dont believe I abuse my children I believe I am being a parent not a best friend and thats what these kids need now a days. Thanks and God bless!
In light of Sara's mis-characterization of non-spanked children, I would also mention that I am constantly complimented on my son's loving and appropriate behavior-- on airplanes, when dining out, sporting events. Occasionally he regresses, as all children do, but by addressing the issue in a manner appropriate to his age, without violence, he does quite well in acting more than appropriately in a wide variety of situations. It's not just about not hitting him. It's about modeling appropriate behavior and teaching him what that behavior.
If spanking really worked as punishment, then why are your children still misbehaving? If spanking really worked then you would only have to spank them once. This is short term discipline and you are teaching your children to fear you and you are also teaching them that "hitting" is okay, especially for bigger people to hit little people. Do people really expect toddlers to understand fully right from wrong? Parents often use this technique when they have lost control of the situation and you feel as though you cant do anything else but to spank, this is a perfect opportunity for you as the parent to take a "timeout" from the situation. I bet if you took yourself out of the situation for at least 2-3 minutes before you punish, you would not spank 90% of the time because you have had a chance to "cool" down and think about what just happened. We are the parents and their role models, and need to represent that to our children the best we can. Spanking, I believe is partly generational, if you were spanked by your parents there is a pretty good chance that you are a spanker, and that your children will spank their chidren, and so on. There are soo many negative effects on children being spanked. Importantly, it has been proven by studies that children that are spanked are more likely to "spank"thier children, be violent, and be abusive towards their significant others. Obviously, I dont spank my child, and no he is no where near perfect, but he is learning which is part of growing up.
Thanks Kim
Every child is different, and discipline that works for one child may not work for another. Spanking does have beneficial effects in some children, in other children it doesn't. Parents know (or should know) their children best, to know what works best for them. Children who are wild and mean are that way because their parents refuse to discipline them at all, not because of the type of discipline used.
Kim mentioned that spanking doesn't work, otherwise it would only have to be used once. Children, like adults, are not perfect and can continue to misbehave inspite of any consequences.
Children are always in a growing mode and things change from day to day. Spanking is appropriate for some behaviors and not for others. I am the mother of four grown children who turned out excellent. My system was to tell them to go to their room until I was over my anger and then we would sit down and discuss the problem and decide on the appropriate punishment. If it was a spanking so be it. It was never done in anger and they were never slapped in anger. All of my children have turned out to be excellent humanbeings, all very successful and not one of them has ever been in trouble at any time. No they were not perfect, but they were loving children and have passed that on to their children. I have the best behaved grandchildren and great-grandchildren and I am extremely proud of them all. My system worked for us, but it might not work for others. Added to this I had one ADHD child, who is now a genius and another LD child who is now the very successful owner of her own business. So you can raise different children and do it successfully. I told my husband one day that I wish we could have bottled our system and sold it, we would have made a fortune. We were lucky to be blessed with great kids.
Discipline is a time for teaching, reconstructing, and reflecting. Adults, unlike children, have critical thinking qualities that are far more mature than children, and yes I do agree children need to learn how to take responsiblity for their actions. I wouldnt know if spanking works or not, I choose not to inflict pain on my child as a discipline technique!
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